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Hermoine

Brrr~

It's a quiet day in the town of Montgomery, Alabama. The Five Guys restaurant is flourishing with its usual busybody customers. I notice we are in dire need of lemons because everyone here, for some reason, loves ice tea with a lemon.

I grab the lemon tray and head back towards the fridge. I check the dates, and as I'm unfoiling one of the containers, I look to my left to see my coworker standing at the fridge door with a grin on his face. Not one of those "Oh, I'm just a happy person and this is a happy day so I'm putting on my happy face" grins. This was more like the, "I'm going to do something terrible to you and I'm grinning because it's already funny" type grins. And then the fridge door closes...

Let me stress this. Who's idea was it to invent a walk-in fridge with no door handle on the inside? I picture the people who created this death box are giggling around a long, square cherry oak table in business suits, whispering to each other, "Let's only put a handle on the outside so the silly bloke locks himself in and gets the sniffles from the cold."

Luckily for me, the door didn't close all the way. But what is this? The bastard has scooted an eight foot rack with all of our cleaning supplies in front of the door. And he's laughing, he's laughing, he's laughing, he's...leaving. I sit there with my arms crossed, half-expecting him to come open the door and giggle at the terrible face I'm making. But then he doesn't come back.

I grab my cell phone out from inside my pocket. Crap. Not only does this fridge not have a handle on the inside, but it's also thick enough to block cell phone service. It doesn't matter, because I don't have my own work number saved in my phone. I try calling my boyfriend first. He's in the room next to me, wrapping burgers. No answer. I call my manager. No answer. I finally call the manager's wife to call the store and tell them I've been the victim of a terrible joke. The phone is crackling up a lot and she can't hear me. I give up and text Thomas, "IAN LOCKED ME IN FRIDGE. REALLY COLD. SMELLS LIKE LEMONS. HALP."

At some point, I wonder if any of my five coworkers stop and go, "Why isn't Lee cleaning the lobby?"

Finally, Thomas checks his messages fifteen minutes later and him and the manager open the fridge door to find a very cold Lee standing there. He looks at me and I go, "...I called you. Where did you think I was?"

"Well, to be honest, all of us thought you were taking a dump in the bathroom."

Great. :l All the employees think I have heavy bowels.





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Comments

did they at least reprimand that guy for that really unfunny joke? :/
Nah, they all thought it was funny.
when life hands you lemons, squirt lemon juice in life's eye then run away.

b
Ahahhaa~!
I hope you are planning your revenge (and what kind of jackass thinks locking someone in a freezer is funny?)
I honestly wouldn't know how to go about getting him back.
There's always the old stand-by: laxatives in the food.
But if he shits all over the toilets at work, I have to clean it!
Well we don't want that.
I can't believe that guy got away with doing that! That''s totally not funny. :/ I've always had a fear of something like that happening to me, though I've never even seen one of those things in real life.

Seriously, who the fuck invented that shit?
I think if it freezer and not a cooler, then I would have been pretty scared. But since it was just a cooler, it wasn't that bad, and since it was so hot in the store that day, it was kind of refreshing, haha.
I would have at least thought the guy would have gotten in trouble for it! That's so mean. *grr* Although, I admit, your text message did make me laugh; I think it was the "HALP!" Your username has never been more apt? :P
Well, my manager thought it was funny. They all know me personally, so we're a tight-knit family.
Ha! Your coworkers sound lovely, just lovely :P


Just to let you know: I added you. Let me know if you want to be friends. :)
Of course we can be. :]